My dad's passing was horrific. He suffered tremendously at the hands of thoughtless and money motivated Duke University Hospital in Durham, NC. Of course, my mom (dad's wife of 55 years) experienced a different but equally paralyzing pain during my dad's mis-treatment of DUH.
I never dreamed that my mom's suffering would extend to the funeral home experience experience. It did.
Brown Wynne Funeral Home in Cary, NC has a fantastic reputation. Silly me thought that "Hall" Wynne in Durham, NC would be likewise reputable. I was wrong. Hall-Wynne Funeral Home in Durham, NC is a creepy, mean-spirited and primarily mercenary group.
My dad died unexpectedly at home late on a Friday afternoon. I gave the Cary Police Department the name of Hall Wynne as the funeral home we chose. (I hoped that Duke, also in Durham, would perform an autopsy).
Two creepy stereotypical mortuary men from Hall Wynne came to my mom's home a few hours after dad's death. She was distraught and wanted to be left alone. But they demanded to meet her personally. But the creepy men never left a card or showed us any identification. They told mom that she had to come to the funeral home the next morning (a Saturday) at 10:00 am to discuss the funeral. Dad died at 5:00 pm on Friday.
Mom told them that she just wanted her husband cremated. Simple. Oh, but that is not how funeral homes make their money.
The creepy men from Hall Wynne apparently rely on grieving widows to sell them doves, bird seed, fancy caskets that are only going to be burned. It is easier to do that if the widow is in a weakened state.
I emailed Hall Wynne and told them that mom was too distressed to meet with them on Saturday morning. Monday was a holiday. My brother and I went to Hall Wynne to make arrangements on Tuesday.
On Wednesday, I was working with Duke Medical to make arrangements for an autopsy. And in the midst of that, a very creepy man (Mike Toole) from Hall Wynne in Durham actually called my mom and demanded money before he would release the body to Duke. He accused mom of just dumping my deceased father on Hall Wynne. She was in tears.
I called the creepy undertaker Mike Toole and advised him that it was inappropriate to terrorize a widow. He could not have cared less that he hurt a new widow. I explained to him that there were actually options for payment - including accepting assignment from life insurance. Toole (appropriate name) insinuated that he doubted we had insurance. He told me that he was "suspicious" that we just brought and left my dad's remains for "so long." He was also "suspicious" that my mom (grieving widow) "could not manage to come meet with him herself." What?
I will find out who regulates funeral homes and report this place and Mike Toole specifically. He was more than just a jerk. He tried to intimidate and harass my grieving mom.
I beg all of you to recognize that after you have cared for an ill person over many years . . . stay strong even through the funeral process. These creeps do not care about you or your feelings. They exist to extract as money from you as possible passed on your palpable grief.
If you live in the Triangle, NC - you can (and deserve to) do better for you and your deceased than Hall-Wynne in Durham, NC.
This is the man you ignored, Duke Medical. He was a very important and loved man. He was more than just an old man with cancer.
Robert Wesley Handy
May 19, 1933 - January 15, 2010
Robert Wesley Handy, age 76, of Cary, N.C., went to be with the Lord, Friday, January 15, 2010. He passed away peacefully at home with his wife and daughter by his side after a long courageous battle with colon cancer (and multiple complications from the cancer treatments).
Bob was a graduate of Brown University (B.S.), Stevens Institute of Technology (M.S.) and UNC-Chapel Hill School of Pharmacy (Ph.D). Bob Handy was employed with Research Triangle Institute as a Medicinal Research Scientist in the Chemistry and Life Sciences from 1964-2000. He coached little league boy's baseball and basketball for Cary Parks and Recreation for over 20 years and was an active member of the Mayflower Society and the Republican Party.
His parents and his son, Roy Wesley Handy, preceded Bob in death. His is survived by Carol Fackler Handy, his loving wife of 55 years; daughter Cheryl A. Handy of Cary; son Peter W. Handy, daughter-in-law Lisa Valbusa Handy of San Mateo, California; 4 granddaughters; sister Barbara J. Kressin of Cardiff, California, brother-in-law James Kressin; 5 nieces and 2 nephews.
The family wishes to extend special thanks to Duke physicians Michael Morse, M.D. and Mark E. Easley, M.D. and Duke Physical Therapist Dana Pierson.
In lieu of flowers, donations can be made directly to "Dr. Michael Morse's Research" for colon-rectal cancer research, DUMC, Box 3233, Durham, NC 27710.
Details about memorial arrangements are being arranged and will be announced at a later time.
My dad could not be treated for cancer (per the Duke oncologist) until his foot was properly healed. The foot was damaged in August 2008 because Veshana Ramiah, MD (a Duke University Hospital hospitalist/stranger doctor who insulted my dad and refused to communicate with dad's Duke Clinic physicians)
Dad was suffering after a January 2, 2010 fall. Duke ignored my telephone calls until I contacted Duke Risk Management! Then Duke oncology called and made an appointment for my dad - to weeks out.
My dad died on Friday January 15, 2010. The last years of his life were unnecessarily complicated by the cruel, inhumane treatment by Duke University Hospital hospitalists/stranger doctors.
I was with dad the last day. He was in his wheelchair and I wanted him to lay down in a comfortable bed. Dad was too weak to stand up on his own.
My left knee (recently repaired after Dr. Chris Dangles of Carle Clinic in Urbana, Illinois performed repeated unnecessary surgeries and effectively crippled me) was still a bit weak. The repair was December 8, 2009.
I bent my knees down to get to dad's wheelchair level. And I told dad to hug me around my neck as hard as he could. Dad wrapped his frail arms around me and I could feel every muscle work to hold on to me. It was the best hug I ever had.
Then I tried to straighten my knees. I hurt and felt a "pop" in my left knee. My balance was off - but dad kept holding me. And so for a few seconds I held my dad and he hugged me. Then I laid him in bed, kissed him on the cheek and told him I loved him and that he was my hero.
My dad smiled and told me he loved me.
I contemplated calling 911 and having dad transported to a hospital. But the horrifying memories of Duke University Hospital's mistreatment and cruelty to my dad were too vivid. I could not put my dad through another doctor like Veshana Ramiah, M.D. or Hope Uronis, M.D. I took dad's blood pressure and it was normal. He was breathing and resting comfortably.
It is a shame that I could not, can not, and would recommend that no one else ever trust Duke University Hospital. IMHO, DUH represents the type of rationing of care and incompetency that we will face in the event universal health care is passed.
Readers of this Blog know that the health care debate and responsible health care reform are my passions. I speak with physicians, patients and politicians about what reforms are necessary in the health care system.
Most informed people agree that the US Chamber of Commerce's Campaign For Responsible Health Reform (http://snipie.com/yhh) is the voice of reason in the health care debate.
I am proud to be associated with the campaign of Bill Randall for United States Congress (NC-13). Bill supports responsible health reform and the Chamber of Commerce's efforts to protect our country from the threat of universal health care (or as current US Congressman Brad Miller proudly refers to it: "Medicare for All").
Readers of my blog are invited to the first campaign event for Bill Randall.
I am sitting with my dad. He is suffering and his doctors at Duke Medical (oncology) don't seem to care.
The most disgusting part of this is being subjected to Duke Medical oncology television advertisements promoting how much they care about their cancer patients. Let me be simple: Duke Medical is not the place it used to be.
I was raised in the Durham, North Carolina area. I was raised with the idea that Duke Medical was the pre-eminent place for patients when they are ill. That may have been the case in the before the year 2000. Now, sadly, Duke is just another medical facility where administrators control physicians and surgeons and where the almighty dollar is king.
By all empirical evidence, Duke Medical hires sub-competent paraprofessionals that run a majority of the facility. I recall when I was a cancer patient at Duke in 2006. The Duke oncologist (Dr. Kimmick) told me to not expect too much from support staff because "they are not that bright." Kimmick actually told me (a cancer patient) that the Duke paraprofessionals aren't very good because Duke does not pay much. She said that they might have better personnel if Duke paid better! Excuse me . . . why is that my problem?
I had orthopedic surgery at Duke (the only department that I would even remotely recommend). But even in orthopedics, the billing department and medical coders were so incompetent that PTs, physicians and surgeons never got paid. For example, BCBS would not pay Duke PT until and unless Duke gave BCBS copies of medical records and a referral from the orthopedic surgeon. Duke never did that! And then the incompetent medical coders coded post operative x-rays as "routine foot x-ray for flat foot disorder." What? Well, I tried to explain that to Duke. And then they recoded as something equally stupid.
Patients have contractual relationships with their insurance companies and their doctors. Medical facilities/doctors have contractual relationships with the insurance companies. And if the medical facilities don't get the claim to the insurance company within a certain time frame, insurance does not pay the claim. So where does the burden fall?
Does the medical facility care more about their contract with the insurance company than the patient. It seems so at Duke.
If you have even perused this blog, you know that Duke University Hospital has tried everything possible to kill my dad. Neglect, mistreatment, abuse. And no one steps up and is accountable. Dad is 76 years old. Duke Medical does not care about my dad. They have made that clear during each and every hospitalization in Durham, NC.
But now it is more insidious. Now even dad's Duke Clinic oncologist will not return our telephone calls. It has been over a week.
My poor dad. Broken ankle that won't heal. Cancer that cannot be treated because of the broken bone. Duke Medical's Ms. Sharon Maddox suggests that my dad find another medical facility if we are unhappy at Duke Medical. That is sweet, Duke and Ms. Maddox. Duke Medical mistreats an elderly man and puts him on the edge of death and then throw up your hands and say - this is the best we are going to do for him. Don't like it? Go somewhere else.
Well I am here to warn you - know your hospitalist (hospital doctor). Don't let a stranger treat you or your loved one - even if they have a white coat on that says "Duke."
And I am also here to warn you that you better care about what is happening in the current politics as it relates to health care reform. "Medicare for all" is a horrifying possibility. Good doctors will leave and we will be stuck with the incompetents that cannot get a better job than that of a hospitalist.
- Calling his oncologist at Duke Medical over the last week and getting no response.
- It's been a long day for me.
My last blog post was mentioned on a message board http://snipie.com/tlmMost members of the message board understood the basic need for physicians and patients to be able to actually communicate --- it is an issue of life and death (if not simply patient safety). But in the spirit of "there is one in every group," I share the following message post:Last time I checked, no one was forcing anyone to see any specific physician. If a patient wants to see a US-born, US-educated physician who uses simple language, he or she has every right to find and consult one. No one's stopping the patient. What does it matter to the patient if some other doctor somewhere else does or doesn't speak English as well as someone born and raised in the US?
When a patient in the United States is admitted to a hospital it is more likely than not that the patient will be assigned to a "hospitist" (stranger doctor). The above post is absolutely correct - no one is forcing you to see a specific physician. That is precisely the point.As such, if you or your loved one is admitted to a hospital and you are unable to communicate or work with that hospitalist (for any reason - the physician does not speak English well, the physician speaks English beautifully but refuses to work with your treating physician or the physician received medical training in a country whose citizens want to kill Americans) then you are duty bound to "fire" that hospitalist.You can fire a hospitalist by
- telling the hospitalist to his or her face or
- contact the patient services or risk management in the hospital and make your wishes clear.
Advocating for a vulnerable and sick person does not equate to being a potted plant or merely taking notes.Just because the individual wears a white coat and/or has the initials MD after his or her name in no way means you must submit your life to their care. Period. It isn't racist. It isn't unreasonable. And if Obama's crazy dream of universal health care becomes a reality then phenomenal United States trained physicians (and physicians from premier countries like Israel) will likely stop treating patients. Obama will put more people in the medical care system, we will need more white coats (regardless of their citizenship, their upbringing or their hatred of Americans).Scary, isn't it? Just ask. Know who is making life and death decisions about you in the hospital.
ObamaCare is going to mean that we will be subjected to more foreign medical graduates. I am generally not disturbed by that fact as long as I can understand what they are saying.
Americans must stop being politically correct. The patient has every right to ask the hospitalist (stranger doctor) where they received their formal medical education. Not the residency or fellowship . . . the actual medical education.
And the patient should recognize that we have enough problems with our own hospitalists (Duke's Veshana Ramiah, MD and Duke's Hope Uronis, MD) and even surgeons (Carle Clinic's Chris Dangles, MD).
There are countries (i.e. Libya, Iran) that do not like us. Why would we permit a foreign medical graduate from a country that hates Americans to treat us or our loved ones? Being concerned does not make you a racist - it makes you reasonably concerned about your personal safety!)
Even the country of Libya admits that its medical schools are inadequate! http://snipie.com/wni
Resolve to protect yourself and your oved ones in hospitals!
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